Sunday, 1 February 2009

Gosh this week has been tough.

We travelled to Guernsey to Auntie Vals funeral which, as expected was very sad. My own emotions were so raw from 10 weeks ago that everything came flooding back with a vengance. The emotions of those around me also brought home just what I'd been through. To see it happen to people that are so close and who I love is heartbreaking. Hopefully I managed to help them a little - I was in the 'been there, done that' syndrome!

We were kept up to date with Auntie Irenes funeral in Torquay too. There were some 300 people attended and it even made the national press (Express) as the vicar who took the service got a parking fine for not displaying his disabled badge correctly. (If you'd like to read more about it Google 'Irene Redhead' and both her wonderful tribute and the Vicars story are within the first few stories that come up).

Sometimes I hate people thinking that I'm the STRONG one. . . the one that can take all life that throws at them . . . I'm really not like that! For all that I wouldn't have wanted to be anywhere else this last week but helping my family, for a lot of the time all I wanted to do was to curl up in a corner and sob (which on a few occasions I did).

Benji not being with us also made it more difficult and I missed him dreadfully. He stayed at Grandmas house, 'helping' each other. I also hope he kept her smiling too!!

So with everything going on as you can imagine emotions were in turmoil and if I'm honest, for all that it was lovely to see everyone (even for the wrong occasion!), I'm so pleased to see the back of it!!

I did say last week that I was worried about my diet as my cousins are fantastic hosts. We certainly drank our fair share of alcohol whilst we were there and ate extremely well. I really tried to be careful and I planned for the excessive food and alcohol intake by being very strict both before I went away and on my return!

With this done ................................................... It's weigh in day.................................................

I've maintained and I'm delighted! I've lost the weight I know I gained whilst away in Guernsey. I have to admit however that I'm ever so slightly dissappointed that the scales never went down any!

But looking back at it, although I was careful what I ate, I did eat more than I would have done at home, I had more alcohol than I care to either think about or remember and I never did any exercise whilst I was away!!

So now is a new week. I've pulled my strings in already (chicken dinner today with a 250ml glass of wine, 524 kcal!! lol). My soup is made and here's to a good week.

Good Health!!





  1. Hi Ellie, I must admit I read your blogs lately with tears in my eyes, very emotional for anyone who has lost someone close. Keep up your hard work, with the healthy meals, exercise & Blogging. I for one and I no Many others are extremely proud of you.xxxx - Love Gill.x

  2. Ellie, I have no doubt that you will succeed, you will be an inspiration to everyone who knows you.
    If you want help with exercise plans let me know... I would be delighted to help... you know I mean that!

  3. Thank you so much for your lovely words Gill. You've now managed to make me cry!! Look forward to seeing you soon xxx

  4. LOL Thank you Andy.
    After the events of speaking to your lovely wife this evening I certainly do need an exercise plan. I look forward to 'battle' on Saturday lol. xxx

  5. Well your up for anything hun...its all in the can do it and you will do it...For the last 3months you have been to hell and back..but now your back you can channel all that pain into positive thoughts. Your Dad will be cheering you on, and knowing that your putting others before you yet again makes you the better person. The ones that know you the best realise that your not always the person that is smiling and cracking jokes.

    You have a hard time trying to be brave and you do need the time out zone, sometimes being like this makes people forget that your not super human and that you need time to cry and have a break down from time to time.

    What dosn't kill you makes you stronger and you have to see that the Ellie 3 months ago is not the same Ellie today, She is more rounded, sees things in a different way but mosly realises that life does go on...but its down to you as to how it continues.
    Be strong..and lets have some laughs...while we get moving for this MARATHON>>>>tee hee xxxx Friend and follower Caz xxx